The Smiths: You have read aloud to a hamster, ferret, or turtle.
Joy Division: You have been bitten by a cat while trying to dress it in period costume.
New Order: You own several fish tanks but no fish.
A Flock of Seagulls: You have destroyed a calculator watch in anger.
Men Without Hats: You have accidentally dropped a pager into a tub of frozen yogurt.